Relationships cannot run on autopilot. How's that for another (not so) amazing discovery?
The problem with autopilot is that you don't know that you are there until you are there. I don't think anyone decides to stop working on their relationship. After a while complacency sets in, the routine takes over and the next thing you know ... autopilot. Which for some folks is not a bad thing. It's comfortable and there are no surprises. However, in my case it signalled to me that something was wrong. Something was missing. We were missing from our own relationship. It was weird. Time that was once set aside for each other was soon overcome by events.
Last night my guy and I were discussing ways to prevent falling back into autopilot. The word sacrfice kept creeping into the conversation. We agreed that in the past neither one of us were willing to really make the tough sacrifices for each other. We're taking steps to make changes. I'm going to stop thinking that I should be the center of his universe and he's going to be more sensitive to the fact that I need to be the center of his universe. :)
We have invested so much time into this and I remember the days when a quick glance from him would make me weak. I remember when I would plan my whole day around seeing him. I remember exactly why I fell in love with him. He hasn't changed ... he's still the guy I fell in love with. It's funny. I don't know why we think that this stuff gets easier with time or as you get older. It doesn't. Hopefully, we get smarter. I think I have. I feel better about what's coming.