Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Pour Your Heart Out - Anniversaries



This is a blog hop sponsored by Shell over at Things I Can't Say. It's called "Pour Your Heart Out" .


I think I (pretty much) pour my heart out anyway, but this is a good way to connect with some great bloggers and read some beautiful, heart felt stories.

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I’m coming up on the first anniversary of the day that I ended my last relationship. The actual day is a little fuzzy. I like to say that it happened on February 28th because in my mind, that is when I left. I stopped taking calls and refused to see him. However, I didn’t actually tell him to his face until March 28th. I’m sticking with February.

I think about all that has happened in the past year. I’ve done a lot of thinking and a lot of growing. Not too much crying. No regrets. Plenty of relief.

In the beginning I used to wonder how in the world I would fill up the hours and the days that used to be occupied by him. I was spending so much time alone remembering and rehashing until it literally made me physically ill. I had to do something.

I needed to occupy my time but not with a bunch of meaningless nothing. I had to try to remember a time before him and ask myself, “What are you interested in? What did you put on the back burner in order to allow him to be on the front burner?” I couldn’t think of anything. It was a rough period. I felt lost.

Slowly but surely things started to fall into place. I stayed prayerful that I would find another church. Did I mention that we were members of the same church and part of the same Praise and Worship team? Leaving that church wasn’t an easy decision to make and some would probably disagree with what I did but before I left I met with my pastor and his wife and explained the situation and they understood. Their concern was that I not stay out of fellowship for too long. I didn’t. I think it took about two months before I found my new church.

Thankfully, I no longer have to worry about filling the hours. Now I look for quiet time. This week I went to the movies on Sunday, had dinner with my sister on Monday, book club on Tuesday, Bible study on Wednesday. I usually have two Life Group meetings a week plus church on Saturday night. Not to mention going to the gym, movies, and restaurants in order to write my reviews.

It’s funny how many changes can occur in one short year.

3 comments:

Shell said...

A lot of changes...positive ones!

Sandstone said...

You seem to be handling it quite well. It sounds like you have found a great way to keep yourself occupied. That's always a great way to lessen the pain of break-ups.

I understand. This past November, I ended a 4 year relationship. It was a mutual thing because we both knew that it had reached a crossroad.

http://thatwhichisme.blogspot.com

platanosandmangoes said...

Happy Anniversary to rediscovering who you are!