I have said many times on this blog and to anyone that would listen that I have absolutely no desire to be friends with my children. In my opinion, they have enough friends. What they need from me is to be a strong parent.
I have seen too many parent-child relationships go up in flames because the parent placed too much emphasis on being friends instead of being a parent. Children need boundaries and their friends don’t set or honor boundaries. Children need structure and that can only come from their parents.
While I still stand by that, I have noticed a shift in the relationship that I have with my daughter. Because I’m now able to view her as a young woman and not a child, I feel as though I can trust her more and I find myself lightening up. I’ve discovered that trying to monitor her every movement is a waste of time and exhausting. She will gravitate towards whatever I try to keep from her and no matter how much I pray that she’ll make the right decisions – the ultimate decisions are still hers.
She’s a good person with a huge heart and a great sense of humor. She’s smart, sensitive and thoughtful and if I wasn’t her mother she would be someone I’d love to call “friend”. We laugh easily together and we actually have real conversations. I really enjoy being around her.
There is nothing easy about being a mother to a teenaged girl. I think it is for that reason that God decided to give me a daughter. Because I used to be teenaged daughter and I know raising me was no picnic. I really hope when the time comes that my daughter only has sons.