Double for your Trouble

I finally got around to seeing "The Social Network" this weekend. I loved this movie. The story of the founding of FB is quite intriguing to me.

The one line in the movie that I can’t seem to shake is toward the end when Eduardo tells Mark that he better lawyer up because “I’m not coming back for 30%, I’m coming back for everything!”

I’m coming back for everything.

This reminds me so much of my theme for 2011: Restoration.

For me, restoration refers to restitution of something taken away or lost.

I lost quite a bit over the years. I lost myself. I lost the love I used to have for myself. There were times when I lost my dignity. I lost my intuition. I lost my self-confidence. I lost my sense of security. I allowed people and circumstances to run roughshod over me and the scars run deep. I allowed the thoughts and opinions of others to diminish my own until it got to the point where I couldn’t even trust my own opinion anymore.

I forgive myself for that. Now it’s time to get back what belongs to me. And I’m not going back to get 30%, I’m going back for everything!

I love Isaiah 61 where the prophet speaks of bringing good news to the oppressed. I especially love verse 7 which says: Instead of shame and dishonor, you will enjoy a double share of honor. You will possess a double portion of prosperity in your land, and everlasting joy will be yours.

I believe that God will restore everything that I lost back to me. Not only that, I should be expecting a double portion.

Now that’s something to smile about.

Restoration

I saw this idea on someone else’s blog and I thought it was fabulous, so I stole it. Instead of making lists of resolutions I have chosen one word that will define 2011 for me. In 2010 the phrase was “no fear” and in 2011 my word is


RESTORE

Dictionary.com defines restore as follows:

–verb (used with object), -stored, -stor·ing.
1. to bring back into existence, use, or the like; reestablish: to restore order.
2. to bring back to a former, original, or normal condition, as a building, statue, or painting.
3. to bring back to a state of health, soundness, or vigor.
4. to put back to a former place, or to a former position, rank, etc.: to restore the king to his throne.
5. to give back; make return or restitution of (anything taken away or lost).

How appropriate for me.

For years, I have felt like I didn’t even really exist. Like I was always the background to someone else’s foreground. In 2011, I will be in the foreground.

I haven’t been comfortable in my own skin because I was conforming to what you (whomever YOU are) thought I should be instead of following my own mind. In 2011, I’m coming back to my normal or original condition.

Whatever I felt I have lost over the years, will be brought back to me. I will take my rightful place. I will stand tall.

I used to believe that I took really good care of myself. I mean, I don’t skimp on the “me” time. I treat myself often. I very rarely go without. But the truth is, when it comes to emotional matters, matters of the heart, I seem to be lacking. It’s difficult to explain other than to say that in certain situations I find it easier to put on a mask that reflects who you think I am. And in the process I may have forgotten who I really am.

In 2011 I will be restored.