I had dinner and drinks with my sister on Friday night. It was a lovely dinner and we had a great conversation. We're both in our forties and we were discussing where we are in our lives and how much things have changed over the years. I used the very corny, cliche line, "I'm in a good place." I told her I hated saying things like that because it sounds ridiculous but that is how I felt. I like where I am.
On Saturday I was hit with something that just left me feeling deflated. Remember, on LaVerne and Shirley when LaVerne would say to Shirley, "When is your balloon gonna land?" Well, mine landed.
Why does that happen?
Seriously, why is it that we can be travelling down a path where there is nothing but tree-lined streets, roses, champagne and sunshine and then all of a sudden you hit a friggin' brick wall?
It's like a reality check. I am not the kind of person who is afraid of good times. I do not go around knocking on wood or waiting for the other shoe to drop. I enjoy my happiness while I have it. But does this make me less prepared for when some shit happens to knock the wind out of me?
It may have felt like a brick wall but in reality I believe it was just a speed bump. Something to slow me down for a minute so I can pay attention to what is going on around me but once I get over the speed bump I can accelerate back to a normal speed.
Yeah, it's just a speed bump.
I believe that sometimes God will allow these "speed bumps" just to see if we will still trust Him during the rough patches. My world has not come crashing down around me and I know everything will be fine. Although there were times today when I really just wanted to die. To just not exist anymore. But I'll get through this and I'll be fine. I can't even say "one day at a time". It's more like one hour at a time. My heart aches. But I know that this too shall pass.