Don't Fight It

I read somewhere that the thing that you fight hardest against is the thing that seems to grow larger in your life and seems to never go away. Or something like that. In other words, the more energy you exert fighting something, the more the thing fights back.

In any case, you all know how I feel about business travel. Not one of my favorite things in the world to do. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that I hate it. Every time my manager would mention that I had to go somewhere I would make a face and cringe on the inside. It always brought back memories of the days when I had to travel to Cambridge 2 days out of the week every week for almost three months. My kids were 12 and 16 then and leaving them for those 2 days and nights gave me anxiety attacks. Now they are older and not really a factor, but it still leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

Early last year, I had to make a trip to S. Carolina to give a 5 minute presentation. I had to take two planes there and two planes back just to sit in a conference room and give a 5 minute presentation. Don’t ask me why I couldn’t have done it over the phone. These meetings were scheduled for once a quarter and it just really upset me that so much time and money was being wasted and I wasn’t quiet about it. It was driving me crazy. I was able to get out of the next meeting but I couldn’t escape the November meeting.

Since there was no escaping it I decided to stop fighting it. I was tired of being upset. I knew that if I couldn’t change it there was no point in being upset. I had to go. So, I put my attitude to the side and consciously made a decision to enjoy the trip. I still wasn’t thrilled about it but I wasn’t going to be upset anymore. During the November trip I discovered a huge outlet mall right near the office. Jackpot! In addition to the 5 minute presentation, I also attended an awards ceremony and an open house. The time was well spent.

I came home, not looking forward to the next trip but not dreading it either.

Fast forward to yesterday … I’m having a conversation with my manager and he informs me that it won’t be necessary for me to make any more trips to SC. Why? Because one of my colleagues is getting married and moving there and will be the resident Administrator in our SC office.

Ain’t love grand?

I find it fascinating that the minute I changed my attitude and decided to stop fighting these trips, I no longer had to take them. I never asked God to fix it so I wouldn’t have to travel, I accepted what was and kept it moving. But God knew my heart and gave me exactly what I wanted as soon as I stopped fighting. The Bible says in Ephesians 6:5-8:

Servants, respectfully obey your earthly masters but always with an eye to obeying the real master, Christ. Don't just do what you have to do to get by, but work heartily, as Christ's servants doing what God wants you to do. And work with a smile on your face, always keeping in mind that no matter who happens to be giving the orders, you're really serving God. Good work will get you good pay from the Master, regardless of whether you are slave or free. (The Message)

The way I see it, a good attitude will always get you further than a bad one.

Answered Prayers

Yesterday’s sermon has been weighing heavily on my mind. The Pastor spoke to us about being the change that someone is looking for. In other words, being the answer to someone else’s prayer.

It’s one thing to pray for someone. I mean, if you lose your job and you ask me to pray for you, I certainly will. But how much more effective would it be to take your resume and submit it to my HR Department? How helpful would it be to offer to bring you dinner a couple of nights a week? Or to watch your children for you so you can escape the stress? Or to buy you a suit for your next interview?

Don’t underestimate the power of prayer. But if you can actually do something to answer someone’s prayer, isn’t that powerful too?

Think about this: If a brother or sister is poorly clad and lacks food for each day, and one of you says to him, “Good bye! Keep yourself warm and well fed.” without giving him the necessities for the body, what good does that do? (James 2:15, 16)

Have you ever imagined being the answer to someone’s prayer?

On another note, I think I am part of someone’s New Year’s resolution. Someone who I haven’t been in touch with for years and years, contacted me through FB and said that they plan to do better at keeping in touch. Interesting.

Om

I had a meltdown at work last week. A full-blown meltdown complete with cussin’ and tears. Ugh!

I can’t remember the last time that happened.

My officemate witnessed the onset of the aforementioned meltdown and she knew something bad was about to happen. “Take some deep breaths and go walk around the building,” she advised. I took her advice. I stormed out of my office and headed for the stairs. I walked up four flights and was still mad. I kept breathing and I kept walking. I needed someone to talk to. I couldn’t return to my office because if I ran into the person that caused this kind of emotion in me, I would have been escorted from the building. For real.

I started praying. “Lord, who should I talk to? Who can I trust?” See, I had to pray for direction because I’m not all buddy-buddy with many people in the building. And truth be told, I didn’t need a buddy. I needed someone who would talk me down and give me sound, objective advice.

God came through and led me to the right person. I made a quick call to see if he was free and I went to his office, asked if I could close the door and took a seat across from him. I tried to come up with a hypothetical situation but my mind wouldn’t allow it. So I just unloaded on him. He put a box of tissues in front of me and let me vent. Afterward, he spoke to me in calm tones, asked pertinent questions and gave me some great professional advice. At the end of the conversation, the tears were gone and I was smiling and calm again. I waited about an hour or so, and requested a private meeting with the person who sent me into this tailspin. We got the situation ironed out and life is good again.

At the end of the day, I thought that all my prayer and meditation at the beginning of each day wasn’t working. After all, wasn’t I supposed to be able to better control my emotions? Well, if you know me, you’d know that I did positively, and effectively control my emotions. When I was younger and more hot-headed and more arrogant, I walked off of jobs (that I needed) for less. So yeah, I believe I handled myself pretty well. I’m still employed and there are no hard feelings between me and the other person.

All the prayer and meditation in the world is not going to change the fact that I am a human being with real feelings and emotions. If you try to screw me over or if I perceive that you are trying to screw me over, I’m going to react. How I react is up to me and will determine the outcome of the situation.

I’m cool now. Cool as a white box fan.

Oh yeah, I got my hair cut on Saturday. Like I said, nothing drastic. Just off my neck and easy to do. Cute, right?

Making Progress

I came home from work yesterday and decided to tackle the clutter removal. I successfully emptied one of the nightstands. Among other things, I came across some photographs. There was one of my first husband who I haven't seen in about 19 years. There was one of my first boyfriend who haven't seen in about 28 years. There was one of my last boyfriend who I haven't seen in about 4-1/2 months. I had the same reaction when I looked at all of them. And that was no reaction.

Now, that's progress!